Turtle standing still.

Shell-ebrate Your Favorite Reptiles With the Funniest Turtle Puns


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We're big fans of animal puns here at Wide Open Pets. Stirring up llama drama and sharing hiss-terical snake puns is part of our identity, so what better way to celebrate the summer than with our favorite turtle puns?

Turtles don't get the same level of attention as some other house pets, given that they're small, quiet, and pretty slow-moving. What these little guys lack in speed, they make up for with their big hearts and even bigger personalities. If you've never owned a turtle, you'd be shocked to learn how warm these reptilian pets can be. (And no, that's not just the heat lamp.)

Break out your old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles toys (we know you still have them somewhere) and prepare for the best turtle puns. These puns about turtles will give even the greatest dad joke champion a run for his money. Just try not to be too shell-shocked by how silly these turtle puns sound!

swimming turtle enjoying puns

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1. You throw a shell of a good party!

2. I hope you come out of your shell.

3. When two turtles get married, the groom turtle says to the bride turtle, "We are a turtle-y perfect match."

4. Don't get sturtled by our crazy New Year's shell-ebration.

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5. Due to finan-shell difficulties, I need to cut back on my spending.

6. My mom runs her kitchen like a turtle-tarian.

7. What do you call a flying turtle? A shell-icopter.

8. Where does a turtle go when it's raining? To find shell-ter.

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9. What do you call a famous turtle? A shell-ebrity.

10. We went to a class about reptiles, but unfortunately it tortoise nothing.

smiling turtle enjoying puns

11. What do you call a turtle chef? A slow cooker.

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12. Why did the turtle cross the road? To get to the shell station.

13. Why do turtles never forget? Because they have turtle recall.

14. What do you call a turtle who takes up photography? A snapping turtle.

15. What kind of photos do turtles take? Shell-fies.

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16. I dressed as a turtle for the costume party and had a shell of a time.

17. How do turtles keep in touch with each other? With shell phones.

18. What do you call a turtle who is only awake at night? A noc-turtle.

19. What's a turtle's favorite sandwich? Sea-nut butter and jelly-fish.

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20. What does a turtle do on its birthday? He shell-ebrates.

turtle laughing at puns

21. What do you get if you cross a turtle with a giraffe? A turtleneck.

22. What do you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine? A slow poke.

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23. There was an accident today between a truck-load of tortoises and a truckload of terrapins. It was a turtle disaster.

24. How does a turtle feel after being electrocuted? Shell-shocked.

25. What kind of jokes do turtles tell? Shell-larious ones.

Hopefully, these turtle-ly funny turtle puns had you shelly laughing.

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Do you know a turtle pun? Share it with us on the Wide Open Pets Facebook page!

READ MORE: Sylvester Stallone and His 44-Year-Old Turtles from 'Rocky' Are Still Best Friends

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